if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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