do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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