i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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