does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
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