i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
