if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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