after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
