Do vagina's smell?
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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