Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
