Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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