on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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