I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize