it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
