Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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