We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?