I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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