you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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