had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize