Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
