someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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