Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
