Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Randomize
