you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
