i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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