holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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