To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I love you. Go after that dick
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
