I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
