i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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