You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
she told me i tasted like america
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
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