R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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