My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
