How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Randomize
