I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
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It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
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You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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