i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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