Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
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