Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
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I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
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Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
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