So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Maybe i donโt have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ๐๐๐๐
Randomize