And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
