Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I'm like, not good at living.
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