finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize