Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
