dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
