I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
