wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
COCAINE IS GR8
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
