Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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