Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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