no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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