Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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