her vagina looked like bernie madoff
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
