Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Shame - the story of my life.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize