I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
