I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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