no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Randomize
